January 1st! New Year New Outlook

Isn’t it funny how we always think that crossing over to January 1st is going to magically change our lives? LOL.

I don’t normally encourage New Years Resolutions, but this year, I’m a believer!

During the last couple of months, my food/health habits have declined, and my weight has creeped up to 141ish. Take out dinners have taken precedence over home-cooked meals, and that has to STOP! I haven’t been as active as usual, and my back “went out” a few days ago. I feel flabby and gross; I’m addicted to fatty junk foods and sugar again.

BUT I’m not considering this to be a failure!

I’m moving into 2013 with a fresh attitude. I have great support from my sweet husband and much-needed inspiration from my buddies over at MyFitnessPal.com.

oranges are healthy

I can do this! :)

1000 Straight Days of Logging Into MyFitnessPal

Whoo hoo.

Today marks the 1000th day of login days at MyFitnessPal!

Even though I am in weight-loss maintenance, for me, it’s important to continue logging my daily food intake. It keeps my calories and other nutritional data on track and since my diary is open to my MFP friends, it keeps me accountable.

Happy 1000th day to me! :)

1000 days of logging in at myfitnesspal

October Unprocessed 2011 – Day #15 & 135.6 lbs

Yay! I’m half way through my October Unprocessed 2011 challenge! There have been a couple of flubs along the way, but I’m not worrying too much. Life is too short to beat yourself up with too much nitpicking.

In general, I think I am doing a great job with the challenge.

And a bonus! I weighed myself this AM, and I was shocked to find that I’m down to 135.6 pounds! I don’t know if that’s a good thing or not; I know I haven’t really been working out, so I hope it’s not just muscle loss. Or could it be from the challenge? I don’t think I was eating THAT poorly before, but maybe these past couple of weeks were “different” enough to cause a change.

What’s Been Happening?

  1. I have been back to baking bread completely with whole grains. No white flour at all, using whole wheat, rye, and corn flours. Bread has been delicious, and it’s renewed my love for wholesome bread again. I admit I was getting sloppy, adding up to half white flour to my bread dough.
  2. I’ve actually stopped eating dark chocolate bars. Not intensionally, it just kind of happened that way. I have a bar of Equal Exchange organic 80% chocolate in my cupboard, waiting for me if I feel the urge to have a bite, but I haven’t really felt the need yet. Equal Exchange is soy free, but does contain “organic raw cane sugar” which might or might not be an acceptable “unprocessed” ingredient according to some participants, but I decided ahead of time that I would make an exception for chocolate if necessary. PS I did make the “powerballs” and they are good, but they aren’t really the same.
  3. I’m still occasionally eating white pasta and white rice. I never considered those to be “evil” unprocessed choices. They aren’t something I eat every day, just maybe once a week or so.
  4. I renewed my love for yummy barley. It’s so inexpensive at the Whole Foods bulk isle and you only have to buy what you’ll need. I bought a small amount of pink lentils, and I’ll be trying millet soon too. The bulk isle is a great way to try out some grains without the commitment of a full bag, and in most cases, the per lb price is LESS than the pre-bagged version anyway!
  5. This challenge has made me soo much more aware of food and ingredients. While at Whole Foods, I usually spend time noshing on samples at the end of the isles, but now, I’m more aware. No more stopping for their “organic” cookies and chips. It actually feels good to pass them and not partake.


We went out to dinner last Saturday night, to the Lobster Tail, a local seafood restaurant. I had purchased a Groupon months ago, and it was set to expire. I ordered a grilled combo dinner of shrimp, scallops and haddock, and was so happy that all the seafood was US-caught! It was absolutely delicious! They also served a side salad (with balsamic dressing), fresh green beans and a wonderful rice, which seemed to be a spanish risotto. There was such flavor, I was thrilled!

And we topped it all off with dessert to go. There was so many devilish choices, but I went with the cheesecake.

It was a deliciously decadent meal and I don’t think I strayed too too far from the unprocessed rules, but if I did, it was worth it! haha!

PS. I did agree ahead of time that I would give myself one day a week to go out to eat, as long the restaurant was fairly unprocessed. Okay, the cheesecake probably strayed a bit too far, but again, I’m not going to nitpick!

Take out dinner last night at the local Asian restaurant: steamed chicken & veggies with Japanese vegetable fried rice. That was probably more in line with “unprocessed” than the cheesecake! LOL

One More Stray

And one last “stray” I want to confess. The other night, we had salads, and I did use Cindy’s dressing (with gums,etc). No, it’s not the worse thing I could have done, but probably not following the unprocessed rules.

The bottle has been open in the fridge before I knew I’d be doing the challenge. I could make the excuse saying that I didn’t want to waste it, but truth is, I just didn’t feel like balsamic vinegar on my salad that night. I wanted a buttermilk creamy dressing. I really need to learn how to make this myself someday!

I can’t promise that I’ll stay away from Cindy’s Dressings again this month. We’ll see.

Sixteen More Days Left

So, 16 more days left! I don’t foresee any problems, and I hope it’ll be as successful as the previous 15 days!

I’ve really REALLY enjoyed reading the daily guest posts over at Eating Rules. I’ve learned lots of wonderful information.

  • What are gums?
  • The Scoop on White Flour – this is probably my favorite post so far, written by Cassidy Stockton from Bob’s Red Mill. I had no idea that some whole wheat flours are not ground from a whole grain. Some sneaky flour manufacturers “separate all three parts of the wheat grain and re-combine them to produce whole wheat flour.” That doesn’t sound as healthy as grinding an actual whole grain. I have been meaning to contact King Arthur to find out what their grinding process is.
  • Zombies & Advertising – a subject very close to my heart. It drives me crazy that Food companies are allowed to vastly stretch the truth in their advertising content and no one is stopping them! Long ago, I stopped purchasing most food products that are heavily advertised in media, and Big Food Corporations are not concerned with our health and well being, but only care about profits!

I can’t wait to read what’s coming in the next 16 days!

136 – Low, probably TOO Low

I weighed in this morning at 136 pounds. Yeah, that’s a bit too low I think. I’m happy with 137, 138.

I think it’s time to increase the calories back up to 1700 or 1800. I’ve been doing okay keeping to around 1650, give or take a few calories.

I’m just happy to be back on track! Went to the doctor’s for my annual physical yesterday, blood pressure is 120/77, and I’m on my way to have my fasting blood test this morning. I’m looking forward to seeing my numbers, especially my vit D, as I’ve been taking 5K four times per week.

Life is good!

UPDATE: raised calories to 1750, a little less than the 1800, which was what I was previously eating while in maintenance.

UPDATE September 27, 2011: I’m up to 137 pounds. I like this weight!

Whoo HOOO! 138.6

I weighed in again this AM. I was a bit nervous actually. I thought perhaps yesterday was a fluke and maybe I was back up. Funny my body “felt” thinner when I was heavier at 141.8 and this morning, I “felt” heavier. But yay, the scale showed 138.6. I’m definitely feeling back to normal.

I am pretty sure it’s really not possible to gain and lose 3 pounds of actual fat in such a small amount of time, so I assume my slight weight gain and loss was due to some sort of water retention.

Hmm, possibly from the rise in activity too. I’ve been working with DH moving and stacking firewood, and we’ve been walking and biking more too. I think I heard somewhere that you can have a temporary weight gain when you’re working your muscles. Don’t they hold in water or something? I’ll have to do some research.

Anyway, I really think I’m back on track. I’m back to eating “clean” and it feels wonderful! But the slightly lower calorie restriction has been a little bit difficult. I’ve definitely been keeping under my lower 1650 calories, but it’s been a challenge. I’m thinking I’ll wait one more day or two, weigh in, and then incrementally raise it back up to 1800 during the following week or so.

Life is good!

Getting Back On Track! 140!

Yes! I think I’m getting back on track. I weighed in this morning at 140! Yay! I still have a little tiny bit more to go, but I’m happy. I feel “lighter” physically and emotionally!

I was a little discouraged, but determined yesterday! After I made my public confession both on MyFitnessPal and here on the blog, I felt relieved!

This has been such a learning experience, and it’s still a long journey!

Weight loss was only the first part of the voyage, maintenance is going to be a life long struggle.

I will always be a compulsive eater. It will never go away. There will be many relapses and that’s okay. It’s normal. I just have to be aware of when it’s happening so I can bring myself back! I can’t be embarrassed or ashamed of myself.

But I’m back on track now. My calories are still set lower at 1650, and we’ll see what happens during the next couple of days/weeks.

Besides learning more about my compulsiveness, I also learned that more than ever, I still need to keep counting calories, and remain active in some sort of weight loss community. I am so grateful that I have such an easy way to do that, with MyFitnessPal – besides their web site, the iPhone app is a God-send. I know emphatically that I would not be as successful if I didn’t have the community and the tools from this site.

Thank you myfitnesspal and to all my friends there!

Confessions of a Compulsive Eater – 141.8

Okay, confession time.

This summer was brutal. While on our vacations, I ate a lot lot lot of sugary foods, & it seems like it made my “compulsive” eating issues come alive a little bit. It was getting harder and harder to say “no” to foods that I shouldn’t be eating.

This weekend, I didn’t think twice about grabbing a couple of processed store-bought cookies & a small bag of buttered/salted popcorn that was offered at a local hardware store’s grand re-opening. ugh.

I never had trouble refusing gross processed cookies in the past, so I know there’s a problem.

I mean, I always felt that if I was going to treat myself, it would have to be something special and really delicious. Not some store bought oreos, chips ahoy, or fig newtons! sigh.

Bottom line, I have been slowly gaining back a little weight. Not a lot, but I’m up to 141.8! I think the gain is a combination of my eating habits and my messed up peri-menopausal system, but either way, I’ve got to do better with my food choices.

I’ve officially adjusted my profile weight up to 141.8 at MyFitnessPal.

I adjusted my daily calories from 1800 to 1650, and posted my confession on my MyFitnessPal newsfeed! What a marvelous wonderful group of supportive friends I have on MFP.

Yes yes yes, I know I can do it!

  • I don’t want to ignore this problem, that’s how I ended up at 200 pounds in the first place!
  • I’m trying to be accountable
  • I’m admitting that I’m doing something wrong and I want to change!

I should add that 140 is actually a “normal” weight for someone at my height of 5’8″ but I feel “normal” at around 138ish.

No, NO NOO. I Am NOT Gaining!

So, I’ve been weighing myself regularly (once or twice weekly +) and this AM I was shocked to see 141.6 on the scale! I haven’t been that much over 140 since April!

I was 139.6 last week. I admit a couple of days, I went over by 100-200 calories, but there were days I was under. I suppose I also should admit that I have been “nibbling” and not “counting” a little bit while cooking.

BUT I’ve also been active, walking/biking and running around the kitchen cooking. I know I didn’t actually gain 2 pounds of fat, but I think I am retaining some water.

Last night, my ankles looked very puffy. I know I’m not drinking enough water. And I’ve got to stop the mindless nibble while cooking. I do not want this to be a permanent thing, and I am pretty sure it’s not, but it gave me a little push to watch myself closer.

And I’m trying to be accountable! I’ve been a little lax and maybe even a little cocky about my calories. There’s nothing to be ashamed of, I just need to stop now, and re-focus.

Autumn is a time to revel in the crisp clean air and ponder life. Yes, I’m happy, I have a wonderful husband, great family, lovely home. I’m lucky. I’m healthy. I’m looking forward to hitting 50 next year! Life is good!

Old Jeans from the 1980’s

Well, since I’m on a nice “high” from my size 8 jeans purchase at LL Bean, I decided to dig out an old pair of high-wasted acid washed jeans from the 80’s. I held them up, and thought no way. They won’t fit, but guess what, they did!

Whoo hoo! I couldn’t believe it. I looked at myself in the mirror, and wow, I still couldn’t believe it. I felt so lean and thin!

Then I tried on an old high-waisted jeans skirt and it fit as well. My DH and I had a good laugh at the same time, because the clothes were soo soo old-fashioned! I mean I remember high waists, but this waist came up almost to my boobs. Well, hmm, could be my boobs are hanging a little lower these days. LOL

I also found a beautiful old embroidered skirt that belonged to my mother when she was a young adult, and that fit fairly well. It was a little too tight in the waist, but I still was thrilled!

I wish I didn’t give away all my clothes from years past. I wonder if I have any more boxes in the attic! I know I had some dresses, pants, blouses, sun dresses, etc. that would probably fit nicely now.

My 2 Year Anniversary!

Darn! I missed my 2 year anniversary! It was on Wednesday the 20th, I thought it was the 23rd! Oh well. What’s important is I made it though another year.

2 years ago, a friend posted an inspirational quote on her Facebook profile and it profoundly altered my life forever.

God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it’s me.

I had been thinking of a change to a healthier lifestyle, but every time I tried, it never worked out. I always got side tracked by tempting sugary, processed foods.

When I saw the quote on her wall, it “spoke to me” – I knew it was now or never.

So, here I am! I’ve lost 60+ pounds, and at 137-140 pounds and a size 8 jeans, size medium top, I’ve never been healthier!

I follow the Mark Bittman / Michael Pollan philosophy of eating a higher-quality, but less-quantity of meat, and focusing on more plant-based whole foods.

Although, I do believe it’s absolutely necessary to regularly allow myself a decadent “treat”, I try to stick to healthy whole clean foods: vegetables, fruits, beans, grains, with humanely raised meat, dairy and eggs.

During this time, I’ve learned a lot about myself and my body. Some days were horrible, where insecurities got the better of me. I read a lot of good books, and learned a lot about nutrition, the environment, and how to live a happy, healthy lifestyle.

And I think most importantly, I’ve discovered my limits. I now know that I am a compulsive food eater. I know I won’t cure my compulsion, so I’ve learned how to live with it, and it’s working!

All in all, Life is good! And I’m so grateful!